My Father

Over the past couple of weeks I have been overwhelmed by the amount of people that care for us.  People have reached out to me telling me that they are praying for my son, I have received cards (which I'm making into a book for Ben), people have sent messages, texts, and calls checking on us, praying over us, and just talking to me- taking my mind off of what's going on. People have sent food, movies, books, arts and crafts, magazines, and items to keep me busy while I'm stuck in the bed.

Truly, our fridge, pantry, freezer, and hearts have never been so full.

People are making it easier for me to keep baby Ben "cooking," and I am so thankful. I am so incredibly thankful for each and every person that has gone out of their way to reach out to us in some way. I absolutely can't wait to tell my son about the amount of people that care about him already!

THANK YOU, FRIENDS!

During my hospital stay my mom was sick with a fever, and you best believe not one person on staff at MUSC would allow her to come anywhere close to that building! I knew she wanted to be with me, I knew she wanted to hug me. I now get that "mom feeling" of just wanting to do anything possible for your baby.

My mom got to feeling better, and a few days ago my parents came to visit. I was so anxious to see them. Sometimes all a kid needs is time with their parents. If you haven't gotten to that stage in your life, you will. You go through that phase when you think you're a grown up and you can totally handle "adulting" on your own. HA! Trust me, you'll always need your Mom and Dad.

Anyway, my parents came at just the right time. I was so tired of laying on my back, sitting on the couch. Staring at the same walls. My dad carefully unpacked every food item people sent, cleaned out my freezer and restocked it. My dad listened and prayed. They brought me new clothes that will be comfortable wearing while I'm stuck on bed rest. My mom carefully selected movies, old and new, to keep me entertained, she brought me a beautiful coloring book, colored pencils, and a sharpener. She brought me a stuffed animal that played calming sounds. She literally thought of everything.

I was thankful. Truly, I was extremely thankful for each item that they lugged in with them. But more than any tangible thing, I was so incredibly thankful for their presence. Being near them was exactly what my child like heart needed at that time.

Because I'm on bed rest, I obviously can't do much, but we got to do a little bit! We went to lunch at one of my favorite places, and we drove around all over Charleston (within my prescribed 20 mile radius of MUSC, of course!) They got me out of the house and got me into the car for some fresh air and some "new" sights. We talked about the heavy stuff, we talked about light-hearted things, we laughed, we were just together, and I needed nothing more, on that day, than to be with my mom and dad.

As I looked back and reflected on that time with my incredible parents, it reminded me of the relationship that we, as believers, have with our Father. He has many names, and Abba Father is such an important one.

We are His children. He desires to care for us, He desires for us to depend on Him. Let me tell you... Never before in my life have I been so dependent on Him. Ben and I are constantly facing battles lately, and it absolutely takes a toll on us physically, financially, and emotionally. But I have a Father to turn to.

I am so thankful to have a Father that cares for me.

A Father that understands my situation when no one else does.

A Father that listens to my heartache.

A Father I can cry to.

A Father that pulls me just a little closer as I sit in my place and yearn for my baby to be okay. 

A Father that can comfort me when the pieces of my heart are scattered on the beige carpet of my baby's nursery.

A Father that picks me up off of that beige carpet, and carries me.

The only way I have made it this far in this rocky journey is because my Father has carried me. When my heart is too heavy to keep filling out detailed paperwork about my son's defect, He carries me. When my ears are too tired to hear any more bad possible situations, He carries me. When my team of doctors ask me life altering questions and I am too heartbroken to form words, He carries me. When my eyes hurt from looking at those annoying sea turtles yet again, He carries me. When I literally can't make myself walk into MUSC for yet another dreaded appointment, He picks me up and He carries me.

I am so very thankful for my Father. I don't know how people go through life, full of ups and downs, full of issues and problems, full of heartbreak, without a Father. 

No matter what you're facing in your life: scary test results, parenting issues, big purchases, loss, heart break, let our Father carry you, friends.

"You are my Father, My God, and my Rock..." Psalm 89:26

Choose Joy,
Allison